Raise your hand if you’re a mother. Now, raise it again if you’re also an equestrian. Finally, raise it one more time if you feel as though you struggle a bit in balancing the two. Both of these roles take up a considerable amount of time, dedication, and are a whole lot of responsibility. As this new year shines upon us all I’ve decided to reevaluate my goals and spend my time more intentionally.
Here’s a short backstory so you can gain further insight on what my day to day life can look like. I’m a mother to three daughters with only one that is of school age. This means I constantly have little ones at home and my days are as busy as you can imagine. I also have two feisty mares that adore our bareback desert rides and a pet steer that loves to play! I used to be an avid rider, but having children has slowed that down quite a bit for the time being. Between cleaning up the spilled milk and the mountain of laundry that seems to grow within minutes, when do I have the availability to go outside?
Finding a balance between being a mother and who you were before is an important and usually overlooked task. I’ve decided to share my goals with you all in hopes that they will help someone else walking a similar path.
- Plan. If you’re anything like me and love to plan out your days and weeks in a fancy new planner then why not plan your outside time. This may sound silly to someone who has older children or no children at all, but I’m not always able to just walk out of the front door by myself to groom or ride. I’ve decided to carve out at least one day a week for a minimum of one hour dedicated solely to my mares outside. My husband helps out tremendously with this on the weekends to make sure I get my ‘me’ time. I hope to be able to bump that up to two or three days a week in the future, but for right now this is an attainable goal.
- Incorporate your children into your riding time. I know all moms need a break every now and again, but including your children in something you’re passionate about can lead to a great bonding opportunity. For example, my middle child absolutely loves riding and when the kids all seem to be driving each other up the wall, I can offer to take her outside to ride and suddenly the energy changes. Adults aren’t the only ones who can benefit from a quick reset and riding provides the perfect opportunity for that. Plus, it helps to get YOU outside and with your horses too! This is what I like to refer to as my ‘spontaneous riding’.
- Don’t limit yourself to only riding. If you’ve owned horses for any length of time, you’ve probably learned that actually riding your horse is literally the thing you do the least lol. Let’s be real, the poop scooping, feeding, vet visits, farrier visits, and all that other mundane stuff is 90% of actual horse owning. If you get to go outside, feel the sun kiss your skin and feed your horses a couple yummy carrots while you give them a big bear hug around their neck, count that as time well spent.
Be easy on yourself, ladies. Riding may not look identical to how it did before you had small children, but that doesn’t mean it’s an aspect of yourself you need to give up. I consider being an equestrian a lifestyle, just as motherhood is. It is possible to do them both together and to do
them successfully. Take small steps and just remember to breathe, Mama. They won’t always be this little.
I would love to hear from other mothers in positions similar to mine and what they might add to this list. Feel free to message me on my personal Insta @unbridledmama. I love reading all of your messages and I promise to respond as I truly value each and every one of you. Lastly, Happy New Year to you all and stay safe.
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